Joy

"An unsatisfied desire which is itself more desirable than any other satisfaction."
- Surprised by Joy, C.S. Lewis

"I can recall clearly some of those moments in my own life, where this poignant sense of longing, falling somewhere between pleasure and grief, caught me by surprise and caused me to wonder from whence came such strong emotion, and how might such an experience be recovered.

As a boy of ten, I recall being transported by the experience of looking through a telescope that an amateur astronomer had placed on a high field at our farm, when I sensed the vastness of the universe and saw the craters on the moon and the magical diphanous light of the Pleiades. At fifteen,I recall a Christmas Eve where the descant on a particularly beautiful Christmas carol, rsising sweet and true above the more familiar tune, left me with a sense of unexpected awe and a longing for something I could not name. ... "
- The Language of God, Francis Collins

I can particularly identify with the statement in bold. For the past 5 years, when I carol with Hwa Chong Voices during Christmas, I have had the privilege of standing next to one of the sopranos with the most beautiful voice who sings the descant. (More like we try to have it our way to stand next to each other, sometimes not to the conductor's pleasure. And no, there's nothing between us. She's happily attached (:)But without fail, x out of x times, the song will finish with a wide grin on my face, leaving me wanting and craving for more.

Or when the timpani and trumpets are used together in "Hallelujah" and "Worthy is the lamb that was slain" of Handel's Messiah, you feel for that instant when the chorus ends, you catch a glimpse of God's glory, which is already sufficient to inspire that awe and longing.

Or the orchestral accompaniment of "Our God is God" by Joseph Martin and J. Paul Williams. No matter how many times I listen to it, I see the skies open up and the angels and creatures of all kinds prostrating and bowing in rows before the throne of glory.

"Our God is God; We are the works of His hands
God is creator; Angels serve at His command
All creation bows before him and we must do the same
For God alone is worthy, Worthy of all praise.
Our God is God!"

Or when the narrative in "Glory and Honour" by Don Moen is read out, I'm reduced to tears. Until know, I can't rationalise the tears. But I am overwhelmed by emotion.

He is able, yes the Lion of Judah is worthy.
I crane my neck, hoping for a glimpse of Him and I'm shocked that what I see is not a lion but a Lamb, a Lamb that had been slain for the sins of the world,
for my sin.
"Then I heard ten thousand times ten thousand angels. In a loud voice they sang,
'Worthy is the Lamb who was slain, to receive power and riches and wisdom and strength and honour and glory and blessing!'
Then I heard every creature in Heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea and they were singing:
'To Him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be praised and honour and glory and power,
forever, and ever AND EVER!

Or when the way to proceed is finally revealed. Although the road ahead is still uncertain, and may be long and winding, but you know to walk on with faith that it will lead to where God wants you to be, whether or not that's where you would want to be.

"Be still my soul, be still my soul
Cease from the labour and the toil.
Refreshing springs of peace await
the troubled minds and hearts that ache.

Be still my soul; God knows your way
and He will guide for His name's sake
Plunge in the rivers of His grace;
Rest in the arms of His embrace.

- God knows the way, God In Us, Don Moen